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How To Get Over A Breakup

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How to Get Over a Breakup

It’s hard for anyone to deal with a breakup. We can often feel like our world’s shattered, leaving us alone to pick up the pieces. Whether you’ve broken up from a short or long-term relationship there’s a period of grief you’ll need some time to recover from.

As much as it doesn’t help to say, the best remedy to heal emotional wounds is time. In time you will feel better and you will be able to overcome the hurt that you are feeling now. Time is the best way you can heal from a breakup, but it is not the only thing you can do.

After breaking up with someone you have a great opportunity to reevaluate what you want in life. It’s a chance for some personal reflection and making adjustments for moving forward in life.

One of the best things you can do after a breakup is invest some time and energy into self-improvement. You can use this as a chance to really get to know and love yourself.

This includes anything from exercising to eating healthier or even picking up a new hobby. The worst thing you can do after a breakup is nothing. By staying home and isolating yourself it’s easy to fall into depression. In order to avoid this, find some fulfilling activities that will help keep you busy.

Make Sure to Process in a Healthy Way

Too often when people process their pain and grief they do so in destructive and unhealthy ways. You will want to avoid doing this at all costs. By being destructive you will only cause yourself more pain in the long-term.

Finding healthy ways to deal with a breakup is the best way to make sure that you get through this and come out a better person for it. Some unhealthy ways of dealing with a breakup are turning to drugs or alcohol. You definitely do not way to lean on substances to feel better. Often times, they actually lead to addiction and end up making you feel worse.

You may want to consider finding a counselor or meeting with a trusted friend and venting it out. If verbal processing is not your thing, maybe consider writing regularly in a journal. Writing is incredibly therapeutic when it comes to resolving the feelings following a breakup.

If you are a creative type, you could use this time as a way to dive into your art. Sometimes the best art comes from pain. By channeling your hurt into something creative, whether it be music or painting, you are able to process your feelings and produce original art.

Many people swing to two different ends of the spectrum when it comes to a breakup. Either they stay home, locked away and start to become depressed or they throw themselves into work and do not give themselves time to think on it.

Avoid going towards either extreme. You need to give yourself a chance to process and be sad. Surprisingly, by not processing your grief you can actually become depressed. You do need to process your feelings, but you don’t want to dwell on them for too long.

Figure out Your Next Steps

Coming up with a plan after your breakup is a smart idea. You don’t want to be too strict with that plan but charting a direction to travel after your breakup is comforting.

Start by making a routine and sticking to it. If you work every week day then it helps to build a routine around that. You could consider getting up 30 minutes early and journaling while drinking some coffee or tea. During lunch try to eat with coworkers or go off and read a book. After work you can try meeting up with friends or go to an exercise class.

Remember not to overdo it though. Giving yourself time alone to think is good for you in the end, even if it doesn’t feel like it in the moment.

Moving Forward

Give yourself some time to think about what you want out of life. Do you want to start considering other options for your life? Maybe your relationship was the reason you didn’t take that job in another state? It might be a good time to start considering where you want your life to be moving.

This does not mean making radical decisions, but it is a good time to consider your options. Maybe you are not happy in other areas of your life? Evaluate where you are but be slow and thoughtful before acting on anything.

Life is too short to be unhappy in a relationship or be unfulfilled in work. Start using your time to decide what you want and what gives you purpose in life. You will overcome the hardship of going through a breakup, and this is not the end.

This article was submitted by a reader from the Surrey Community. You can submit your own community story, press release, event or public notice directly to our Community Board today! We also have advertising and promotional options for businesses.

Community Board

Rally Against Police Murder July 4 Surrey BC

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Vigil for Ejaz Choudry and Rally Against Police Murder 
MOVED TO JULY 4
We demand and public inquiry into how Police Murder are handled. 

The Al-jamia Mosque in Vancouver and Coalition Against Bigotry will hold a prayer vigil on Friday June 26th at the Al-Jamia Mosque at 655 West 8th Ave during at
during Friday Juma prayers at 1 pm to mourn the murdered of Choudry, a 62 year old South Asian man struggling with his mental health by the police in Malton Ontario on Saturday June 20th.

Because it a 50 person limit in the Mosque, people can join and online solidarity prayer vigil on Facebook. Please can pray in their own way and time or have a moment of silence to think about the tragic murder of Ejaz Choudry.

Then join West Coast Cop Watch and Coalition Against Bigotry-Pacific for a Rally and March Against Police murder and abuse on July 1st at 1 pm at the Central City Mall where the Independent Investigation Office of BC is located, to protest the lack of police responsibly and accountability of the murder and abuse by the police. We demand a public inquiry into how police murders and handled in BC. We want to remember Chantel Moore, Ejaz Choudry Kyaw Din, Tony Du, Navarone Woods and many others, mostly Indigenous, Black and People of Colour who have been murdered or abused by the police.

Kyaw Din, who also struggled with his mental health like Ejaz Choudry was also murdered by the RCMP in Coquitlam last year in his home. The Din family held a rally outside the IIO office and Surrey City Centre in February demanding answers from the IIO. They don’t even know the name of the police officer who killed their brother. We also remember Tony Du who was murdered by the Vancouver Police, a Vietnamese, Chinese man also struggling with his Mental health. The police officer who shot Du did hot get charged with murder.

We also Navarone Woods, a Gitxsan indigenous man murdered by the Skytrain Police. The Coroners Jury and also asked for better mental health support during police incidents.

We ask people to wear masks and keep 2 meters distance. We will march to the RCMP E Division Headquarters and then end with a potluck physical distance picnic in Green Timbers Urban Forest.

We acknowledge that this event is being organised on the occupied, traditional, ancestral, and unceded territories of the Coast Salish peoples – specifically the Musquem, Squamish, Kwantlen, Semiahmoo, Stolo, Musqueam, Katzie and Qayqayt Nations.

For more information, contact Imtiaz Popat at 604 396-2072

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Community Board

Local Innovation Combats Overdose Crisis

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OVERDOSE INTERVENTION APP: New Digital Technology Released to Address the Overdose Crisis

Today, Oxus Machine Works Limited (OMW Ltd)., a local health technology firm that specializes in innovations for diverse communities, announced that they are releasing the Overdose Intervention App (ODi) to combat the ongoing Public Health Emergency and the staggering rise of overdose deaths during COVID-19.

Of this innovation and its impact, Upkar Singh Tatlay (Managing Director) of the tech firm Oxus Machine Works said, “This vital tool engages the entire community in ensuring we are prepared for any circumstance that involves an overdose emergency. Often the onus is on the user themselves but by placing this digital asset in everyone’s hands we are making sure that this a community-wide response and we are all empowered to act.  In addition, communities that are most directly impacted by this health crisis such as South Asians are often left out of consideration when it comes to programming, technology, and content. ODi ensures that the unique needs of BIPOC communities are met through the delivery of linguistic and culturally appropriate content.”

The deployment of the Overdose Intervention App will happen through a network of peers with lived-experience along with the ongoing work of outreach events that are held every week. Media and key stakeholders are encouraged to attend to see proactive steps taking place to address the overdose crisis.

Overdose Intervention App: The Overdose Intervention App (ODi) allows users of different communities and language backgrounds to rapidly respond to an overdose emergency with resources and guidance that is suitable to their needs. This app includes an innate 9-1-1 calling feature, techniques to identify a suspected overdose, steps to administer naloxone, and sequential guidance on emergency first aid response. The Overdose Intervention App allows everyone to access linguistic and culturally relevant resources to offset the dangers of an overdose for free on both Android and Apple devices.

Web:  www.stopoverdoseapp.com

Facebook: @stopoverdoseapp

Instagram: @stopoverdoseapp

Twitter: @stopoverdose2

 

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The Witch of British Columbia, Canada | Stand-Up Comedy by Madhav Mehandru

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This video is about last year when 3 Stand-up comedians from Punjab had a stand-up comedy show in British Columbia [Victoria], Canada on 1st August 2019. How I and other Stand-up comedians Raj and Akshay from Kapurthala [Punjab] tackled difficulties of first time going in Canada and performing on a big stage in victoria [British Columbia], Canada. As a Punjabi, we were very excited to visit Canada and performed there and it was a rollercoaster ride from landing in Canada and meeting difficulties from time to time. First, we had difficulty in understanding English than when I met a witch in Victoria [British Columbia] and how we tacked that witch then our show organizer refused to pay. This video covers our days in Canada from 31 July to 3rd August and finally arriving home in Kapurthala, Punjab on 4th August.

Follow me on social media Profiles :- Instagram:@madhav.live/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/comiccc/

By Madhav Mehandru

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Community Board

DIVERSEcity CEO Neelam Sahota talks about supporting mothers at home and in the workplace for Mother’s Day

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On Mother’s Day this year, let’s take time to not only celebrate mothers, but really acknowledge them. See them. Not just the smile on their lips, but the worry in their eyes. The exhaustion on their faces. The load on their shoulders.

The COVID-19 global crisis has highlighted the emotional, often invisible, workload that mothers carry. It has also increased that workload.

As we self-isolate in our homes, mothers are carrying the burden of homeschooling, often while working full-time jobs from home, in addition to the cooking, cleaning, shopping and so on.

Many are also still working outside the home, as leaders on health care’s frontlines, or working in essential or service industries, helping us all safely access groceries and essentials during this crisis. We are also seeing amazing women leaders rise up to battle this crisis at the policy level.

For all of them, traditional lines of work and home are being blurred, and it’s important we don’t dismiss or ignore the pressure mothers may be under now — and as we rebuild our workplaces after COVID-19.

As a mother myself, I remember the challenges of building a career in a traditional workplace when my kids were young. When I took on the role of CEO at DIVERSEcity with three children under the age of 12, I was fortunate to have a strong support network. But I still had to make accommodations and choose priorities for myself as a professional versus a mother. During this crisis, I can only imagine the strain working mothers of young children are currently under.

The Canadian Human Rights Commission says that COVID-19 is “having a disproportionate impact on women. Social and economic barriers have been amplified for racialized women, Indigenous women, migrant women, women with low income, single mothers and other women. They are at greater risk of job loss, poverty, food insecurity, loss of housing and domestic violence.”

The Commission recommends taking a feminist approach to re-establishing our workplaces. Canadian Women’s Foundation calls for us to invest in diverse women’s leadership opportunities and empower girls, asking us to imagine what women could achieve if we supported them to the fullest.

Flexible workplaces need to be more of the norm

As a leader of a social services organization, I want all my employees, especially mothers, to feel supported during this crisis. As we all continue to work from home, providing services to our clients through phone and virtual options, I want them to know we see them, we appreciate them and we will give them the flexibility they need not just during COVID-19, but as part of our permanent organizational culture. I would not be in my role today if I did not have flexibility in my career along the way. This is my commitment to working mothers in our organization. You don’t have to choose between being a mother and being a professional. Organizational cultures like DIVERSEcity’s need to be the equalizer and more of the norm in our workplaces today.

As for what’s next? Let’s use the lessons from this crisis to reimagine the 21st century workplace more thoughtfully. Let’s all be more flexible and more authentic to who we are and what we need as professionals, as parents, as humans.

To all the mothers holding things together for their families in these challenging times, have a happy Mother’s Day.

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Community Board

Seeking Yoga Instructors interested in giving classes outdoors in parks

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Hi There!

Just wondering if there are any Yoga  Instructors interested in giving outdoor classes at Bakerview Park in South Surrey? It is an awesome, well tended park with lots of space for social distancing. Since Community Centers are closed and will remain so for the foreseeable future, activities like this would be great and popular, I bet. Specially with the weather getting nicer everyday. Anyone?

Contact authorannicklemay@icloud.com if interested.

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